Someone Missing

We have had such a wonderful week at the beach! I love having uninterrupted family time with nO work for Chad and time with extended family. I. Love. The. Beach. But this year I have loved it just as much but with a void…I want my other child. This week I have wanted her with a fierceness that I simply cannot explain. Chad and I have spoken of her in every private moment. We long for her to share this week with us…next year she will, but right now, it is not helping to know this. The other kids, and really all of our family have thought and talked of her constantly. I wish she knew how we are longing for her. She started school yesterday. I wish I knew how her first day was…………this waiting is not fun.
Last night I dreamed of Chad and I going to the airport, except I forgot my passport and had to race home, praying not to miss the flight and get it while Chad stayed at the airport. And then I woke up….and thought “whew!”. And went straight back to the same dream. I hate that.
So today while sitting on the beach Chad and I decided that we will put all of our fabulous shells from this trip in a bowl on her night stand. And when she arrives we will tell her how much we missed her on our summer vacation…how thankful we are that she will never miss another. How she was part of every conversation, and that we were all thinking of her with every shell we collected.